When nothing is preposterous

Satire is dead, killed by reality.

If Jonathan Swift were to pen this his “A Modest Proposal” today a large percentage of readers would consider it a serious proposition that solves two problems at once.

This is because we live in an age in which refugees from wars pitting factions of their own religion deem it appropriate and righteous to kill people of another religion in their adopted homelands.

This is because government agencies such as the EPA take scientific evidence that there is no “widespread, systemic impact” due to fracking and release a final report that says fracking “can impact drinking water resources under some circumstances” and that “impacts can range in frequency and severity.”

This is because government agents who are caught patronizing prostitutes get bonuses instead of being fired, while generals who have mistresses get demoted and brought up on charges, but presidents and presidents-elect who have serial affairs and commit lewd acts are praised.

This is because one major party nominates a proven liar and manipulator to be president, just ahead of a self-declared socialist who isn’t even a member of the party, while the other nominates a clueless, classless, guffawing clown who has only been a registered member of the party since Wednesday and who can’t remember what promises he made last week and doesn’t care.

This is because federal land agencies can protect and preserve wild horses by letting them overbreed and starve to death on the range.

This is because fake news is being fact checked by news fakers.

This is because people say they want to protect free speech by putting a limit on how much free speech others are permitted to have.

This is because people blame their losing an election on the fact Russians hacked their email accounts and revealed their devious plots and manipulative efforts to win the election.

This is because a U.S. senator who has served in that body — in which each state has equal representation no matter its population, land mass or collective IQ — for three decades can say with a straight face and without fear of being ridiculed that the Electoral College is “very undemocratic.”

This is because environmentalists can declare they are saving the planet by preventing one-acre oil and natural gas well sites from despoiling the land, while lauding the erecting of endangered species killing solar panels and solar thermal mirrors and wind turbines on thousands of acres of public land.

This is because people can say without a hint of irony that they will not tolerate intolerant people.

This is because people see no problem with  demanding raising the minimum wage so some more people will make a decent salary even though many will lose their jobs entirely.

People say satire is dead. It’s not dead; it’s alive and living in the White House.

Robin Williams

The most brilliant satire of all time was ‘A Modest Proposal’ by Jonathan Swift. You’ll notice how everything got straightened out in Ireland within days of that coming out.

P. J. O’Rourke

Political satire became obsolete when they awarded Henry Kissinger the Nobel Peace Prize.

Tom Lehrer

I have never knowingly, I swear to God, written satire. The word connotes exaggeration of the foibles of mankind. To me, mankind just has foibles. You don’t have to push it!

Tom Wolfe

Praise undeserved, is satire in disguise.

Alexander Pope

You can’t make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you’re doing is recording it.

Art Buchwald

15 comments on “When nothing is preposterous

  1. Bill says:

    Bravo Mr. Mitchell. You might have also included Lewis Carroll as well since so much of what we are seeing and hearing has a surreal sense. Perhaps the closing line from the movie, “Bridge on the River Kwai” sums it up best.

  2. Steve says:

    One issue. The Russians did no hacking at all. Podesta got an email asking him to give his password away. Which he did once front line help desk OK’d it via channels who removed the proper instructions for doing so.
    Totally amateur move on his part. He opened the door, can’t blame anyone for walking through it!


  3. Steve says:

    Like the satire posted?

    Here’s some irony. Seems it is wished we change the word “Phishing” into the word “Hacking”
    The two are NOT one and the same. Podesta gave away his password. It was not “Hacked” he fell for a phishing email. Amateur.


  4. Steve says:

    Why, yes it is!
    Podesta fell for an amateur move and

    Vader is simply misunderstood!

  5. Rincon says:

    Very amusing, although I can’t buy all of it. For example, saying that the fracking study was doctored is a bit hard to swallow when the number of magnitude 3.0 or higher earthquakes in Oklahoma went from 2 in 2008 to 889 in 2015. http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/2016/11/07/oklahoma-earthquake-fracking-well/93447830/ It is true that raising the minimum wage will cost jobs though. Witness that slaves were fully employed. Nevertheless, I thought I would try my hand at it:

    This is because the same people that espouse individual freedom want lock up drug users and are against elective euthanasia.

    This is because we try to impeach a President for cheating on his wife, but elect one who pleaded the 5th amendment 97 times when asked about his alleged adultery.

    This is because we call it fraud when one person lies to another for monetary gain, but when corporations do the same thing to millions, it’s called freedom of speech.

    This is because people whose carelessness leads to the death of another often draw jail time while corporations pay a fine,

    This is because when Julio sends money out of the country, he’s arrested for money laundering. When corporations do it, they’re taking advantage of tax law.

    This is because we believe that cutting taxes increases government revenues, even though it never has.

    This is because people who thump their Bibles want the death penalty and tell the poor to take care of themselves. They’re OK with torture too.

    This is because a rising tide lifts all boats, but it only works for boats.

    This is because many of those too clever to be fooled by climatologists want creationism taught in the schools.

    This is because those who want to shrink government expand defense.

    This is because we believe in states’ rights. If a doctor loses his license in one state, it’s important that he can set up shop in another.

    This is because those with preexisting illness shouldn’t be insurable if they lose their jobs.

    This is because those who think the government can’t run a three car funeral believe the courts infallible enough that they advocate the death penalty.

    This is because we spend twice as much on health care as the Swedes, but die younger than they do.

  6. Steve says:

    And so called “Frack Quakes” weren’t due to fracking at all.
    The cause was (stress WAS) due to injecting the waste frack fluid back into the ground. This has since been halted and those so called “Frack Quakes” have abated.


  7. Linda Sanders says:


  8. Rincon says:

    Thanks for the information, Steve. Looking further into the same Web site, I found this, which suggests that the earthquakes are due to another enhanced extraction technique, but are still from the activities of those pumping oil out of the ground:

    “Oklahoma now has more earthquakes on a regular basis than California. Are they due to fracking?

    In a few cases, yes, but in most cases no. The majority of the earthquakes in Oklahoma since 2011 occur in areas where oil is being produced by pumping massive volumes of water out of naturally fractured formations to extract much smaller volumes of oil. Most of the wells used to access the oil are completed without being fracked. The natural formation water that comes to the surface with the oil is too saline to be released into the environment. Disposal by injection into deep formations is currently the most common method of disposal. Injecting large volumes of water into the deep sedimentary formations raises the pore pressure over large areas that can induce earthquakes”. https://www2.usgs.gov/faq/categories/9833/7711

  9. Steve says:

    Says the same thing. Injection os waste water into the earth is causing quakes.

    So, the real term should be “waste water injection induced quakes”

    But “FRACK QUAKES” is much better hype…also a lie.

  10. Rincon says:

    Agreed, but it’s just as accurate to say oil company induced earthquakes. Waste water injection induced quakes is more than a euphemism – it’s obfuscation unless explained thoroughly.

  11. Steve says:

    The only conclusion possible is (yet again) it’s not the uses we put fossil fuels to.
    It’s what we do with the waste that matters.
    This is applicable to all forms of energy.
    In fact handling waste is applicable to all forms of human activity.

  12. Rincon says:

    Such as some of Trump’s cabinet appointments 🙂

  13. Steve says:

    I’m actually pretty impressed with most of them. I like all the Military being brought on board.
    And Tillerson was recommended by Condoleezza Rice and Exxon is doing a lot of work on carbon capture.

    Though, Rick Perry for Energy got a WTF, even though Texans flout their wind power. Perry had little to do with it, George Bush was the Governor who signed the legislation making it happen. All Perry did was grow the infrastructure to get the electricity to Texas’s grid. Perry is not really good for energy, he’s more about growing jobs.

  14. Rincon says:

    From Time Magazine 12/26/16 p. 14: “…the President elect is stocking his Cabinet and senior staff with the same sort of connected insiders that he railed against on the campaign trail. He’s tapped 4 billionaires for his Administration, not to mention 3 current and former financiers from Goldman Sachs, the investment bank he pilloried rivals like Hillary Clinton and Ted Cruz for cozying up to. His intended nominees donated millions to back Trump’s candidacy and helped finance the super PACs that boosted his upstart campaign down the stretch.”

    And of course, his Chief Strategist, Stephen K. Brannon, ran Breitbart News. Making Rex Tillerson, President of Exxon Mobil Secretary of State suggests strongly that Trump has no intention of getting off foreign oil. Any bets as to where the next war will be? Scott Pruitt, an oil man and global warming denier makes as much sense for the EPA as an atheist priest would for a church.

    Sounds to me like business as usual for Washington.

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